Thread: Tales of Animeb

can you imagine this coming about through anything other than careful planning?

No, it was entirely whimsical. It's not often I'm gripped by a bout of creativity so decided to make the best of it. I had a daydream (while in bed, after I'd turned my light out, but before I was asleep) about a brave warrior defeating a monster by giving it a nosebleed, and I think things led to the nymphs encounter... Wrote some notes when I woke up, and worked on most of the story on the way to and from work that week

Oh, well nicely done in that case.

i want more dammit.

Be patient or write it yourself

da emPyres part 2 comin up!

Actually, you're right. I should've written something by now. Let me poke Bal.

Originally Posted by Kira Yamato

i want more dammit.

my creative output is exhausted (and I'm not sure my contributions are entirely canon anyway ) SO that's up to Chao. Poke-a-Bal is obviously a very popular sport

I've postponed this a little too much, since me and Bal wanted to do a surprise, but maybe next time.

Tale 15

It is not known by everybody, but long ago, when men would speak rude languages and dress poorly, there were two secret empires. And their aim was to conquer one another.

One was the Ecchi Empire. The everyday life of an Ecchier was not varied, as one Ecchier would stay most of his day looking at appropriate pictures or smirking at the girls and boys in the streets. Yes, the Ecchiers' streets were a dangerous place to be in.
The Ecchi empire king, Miroku, had greater activities. While he still preached everyday to their god to see cute girls in diminuished costumes, he reserved a bit of his time to perfect his strategy to defeat his enemy empire.

His greatest desire was to spread the Ecchi system throughout the globe, and eventually finding his own female companion.
The Other Kingdom was also one of much perversion. Yet unlike the Ecchi kindom, they focused on those younger then they themeselves. They were branded the Kingdom of Lolicon.

The Kingdom of Lolicon was known far and wide for the antics of its King, the Lord of Pantsu Hinarei. For there was nothing he would not do in order to satisfy his dark desires.

While war began to brew between the two kingdoms, the Lolicon King would seek the Pantsu shamens, who, finding creases in panties, would produce spiritual guidance for the King.

Kings as powerful as these two could not have guessed that a certain individual was about to change the course of history.
In the capital city of the Lolicon city lived a young boy who, despite his parents’ orders, refused to look at little girls. He simply didn't find them attractive in any way and was disgusted by them.

As years went by, his interest in girls didn't increase, even with the help of spiritual guides. Therefore, the king Hinarei ordered him to be banned from the empire and never to return.

His parent's, his King, and even his Empire turning their back upon him, the boy left with hunger in his heart.

As he searched for that 'thing' he so desperately missed, he came across the golden fields of the Empire of Ecchi.

Lost at first, it soon dawned upon the boy that he was in enemy territory, and fear flooded the core of his being. As he wandered aimlessly, he was soon discovered by the Elite Ecchi Guards of the King, whom often wandered these fields for...activities.

Soon, after witnessing his inability to speak the Ecchi dialect, he was captured and transported to the King Miroku's personal dungeons. He didn't have a doubt: he'd be held prisoner and used against his own country. Little did the Ecchi empire know that the Lolicon Empire would never do anything to save him.

He spent in that dungeon many days and nights. Mostly nights, because he couldn't get any sunlight. However, after two weeks of solitude, one day he heard the door of his cell open. And could not believe what he was witnessing. It was a beautiful girl.

She was the Grand Torturer of the ecchi Kingdom, was sent to discover his true purpose. It wasn't even a day, before she realized the lolicon tortures would not work on this boy, for he loved the regular women he was shown instead of the various bits of lolicon she threw in to egg him. Curious of this development, she took her findings to the King whom sent for the young man for an audience.

It was there, the King learned the truth of the boy's plight, and took mercy upon him for his tastes which had driven him away from his very home, where people had loved him

However, he was not a free citizen. He could live in the Ecchi kingdom with a lot of restrictions, such as living in a huge tower in the castle. He would also be visited by the Grand Torturer of the Ecchi Kingdom, who went by the name Shinobu Angel, who was still suspicious about the true aims of the Lolicon boy. However, this latter condition wasn't something that didn't please the man.
Little by little, Shinobu Angel came to accept the driven-from-home boy, so did the king.

As the circumstances surrounding the boy soon came to be called normal, war broke out in the front lines of the Ecchi kingdom. The King, troubled by this sudden turn of violence, was unsure of what to do in this situation, his people wanting peace while he himself felt that they were threatened by the antics of the Lolicon.

Calling upon the boy for another audience, they discussed the situation together, the boy, thankful for the kings help, vowing to help him in his time of need.

It was then, that the boy dropped his former name, and took on a new name, given a title that only the greatest of the Ecchi Kingdom could use, the title of Raoh, and thus he was given control of whatever he needed for this battle.

And now, he understood his position. He was trusted but he'd fight and kill his family and former friends for the sake of a country he didn't even know if he liked.

However, since he didn't like discord, he presented a new idea to king Miroku. His idea was to, instead of having a war, have a competition between the two countries, to see whose ideals were better.

The King was not convinced but agreed to host such a competition.

The competition was to be a bloody one, Ecchi pitted against Lolicon. Thousands of citizens approached the site of their battle, the Pantsu Colliseum, built especially for this competition within the span of one week.

Erected High and mighty, the Collesium shook with the roars and cheers of those who had came to watch the competition.
As the warriors geared themselves for battle, they were both allowed to choose their weapons before hand, a surprise until the battle began.

Raoh insisted to be one of the participants, even though he knew it'd be hard for him. Along with him, 3 more warriors walked in that corridor, Shisho the Great, Kira Yamato the Perverted and Katajainen Lord of the Nude. At the end of that corridor, 4 little girls greeted them with smiles and assassin grins. Those toddlers too wanted to destroy the enemy.

As the gates opened towards the Coliseum, the 8 warriors advanced.

The men, eyebrows raised at these little girls, didn't know if they should laugh or curse their luck. One could not simply attack little girls. Yet these girls had no such hindrance, as they pulled monstrous looking weapons from out of nowhere. The men visibly paled, yet the boy moved forward, unafraid of such opponents.

The girls were surprised that their charms did not work against this stranger, yet as he marched forward, they shook it off as nothing but foolish bravado as rushed to attack him.

They were mistaken.

The boy Raoh didn't scream. Nor did he feel afraid. Kneeling, he gained speed to run towards the four opponents. From his hands, the first girl was able to see a brown object before she was brutally attacked. Her weapon fell in the floor while she laid still. The other 3 waited for any movement and the boy showed a grin. Suddenly the girl in the floor screamed of happiness after having received such a wonderful teddy bear from the enemy. It'd keep her distracted.

The other 3 girls were less confident now, but hadn't given up.

Moving in literal V-formation, the girls approached the boy cautiously, unsure of what other tricks he had up his sleeve.
High above, the King of Lolicon Hinarei frowned in disapproval, unable to make out the champion of Ecchi's face. How could such a warrior exist in their kingdom? That knew of the weaknesses of these girls. It was MADNESS!!!

It was no Madness. It was the spirit of the Ecchi empire in his veins!!

The girl on the left noticed movement coming from Kira Yamato the Perverted. Quickly, she ran towards him and stuck her pointy knife in his chest, before the boy could do anything. His distraction was enough for the other two girls to counter attack with their brutal weapons and hit him in the stomach. Dust covered the Coliseum as his figure was thrown against the wall.
Shinobu Angel and the King of the Ecchi empire stood up, fearing for his death. He was their thrump card.

Moved by the spirit of the young warrior, the other three champions rushed to his aid, closing their eyes as they pushed their hands infront of them, trying to push them away without their cuteness coming into their own eyes.

It was all they could do, as the girls backed away from the champions, frowning as their fun was being destroyed.

As the boy fell to his knees, the three warriors surrounded him in a protective formation. Shouting that he was a true warrior of Ecchi, and that he truly deserved the title of Raoh they vowed to protect him on the field of battle.

The three brave warriors advanced towards their three enemies. However, they were not able to deliver the finishing move, as those cute and sad faces prevented them from doing so. The girls turned their pleading faces to grinning expressions and at the same time moved their weapons, finally injuring their enemies. One by one, Shisho the Great, Kira Yamato the Perverted and Katajainen Lord of the Nude fell in the floor unconscious.

With one bleeding eye, but ready to stand, Raoh faced the enemy.

As he faced the enemy, Raoh dropped his weapons. The enemy, taking this as a sign of victory, as they cheered. Too late, did they notice the young warrior standing over them as he reached out and pulled out his greatest weapon which Shinobu Angel had given him....gum. Popping three pieces in his mouth, he chewed furiously before grabbing each girls hair and spitting onto it.

The girls, shocked by this, looked at each other momentariliy before falling to their knees and crying. Both the King of Lolicon, Hinarei, and the king of Ecchi, Miroku, stood, shocked at what had happened. How could this be?!

Reactions were varied from the public. The cheerers of Lolicon stood without reactions as their dreams were crushed by a simple gum. The Ecchiers stood up and cheered for Raoh, giving the boy a feeling of well-being. After all, he had decided well: the Ecchi empire was truly within his spirit.

However, as he noticed some Ecchiers were trying to kidnap the female Lolicon citizens, he stole the microphone from Selo, the spokesman of the event, and made his final decision to change the course of history. Never again should the two empire fight, he thought.

As Raoh stood in the middle of the colliseum, he surveyed the many people their from opposite kingdomgs and spoke. Calling out to all of them, Raoh spoke of cooperation, telling them that they were not so different. Did they not cry when gum was in their hair? Did they not succumb to moe together? Why continue this meaningless battle? As he spoke, the crowd fell silent, their eyes drawn to the boy.

The King of Lolicon, whom had banished the boy, shed a tear at the boys words and moved to stand before the King of Ecchi. Locking eyes, both kings raised their fists to the air, simaltaneously calling for peace. The crowd, exhilerated, began to dance and cheer, as Sweet Home Alabama began to play in the collesium speakerphones.

Moving away from the microphone as the stadium errupted in dance togetehr, Raoh made his way through the crowd as the bumped into each other. Stopping for a moment, he looked up to the top podium where the king of ecchi had sat, only to see Shinobu Angel looking down upon him. Her hair flowing in the wind, she smiled down upon the Warrior whom now had a home, and as he looked up to her, he too smiled. It was the start of a new beginning for all.


THE END

Note from Chao: Wow, it was actually a nice ending for a change. Sorry it took so long, but maybe we'll do a special edition of the story to make it up for you guys.

Thanks for reading. This is the last tale of season 3 of Tales of Animeb.

Bal & Chao

Lol

I feel like such a bad-ass now.

Great Job guys!!

im so offended

I don't see why. XD

im no pervert. im a human being with natural bodily hormones.

interesting read, Chao-chan I enjoyed it, even if I lost my way a little during the arena scene :/ To my mind, you could have done more to keep that together and explain better what was happening and why the characters were chosen for their task. Overall, a thoroughly good tale Can't imagine warring nations on here though, no. Perish the thought

*POWERBOMBS HINA*

If we did that, it wouldn't be a simple tale and we'd have to make a novel. FOOLISH NANA!!

well maybe some of us want novels, Balsaki I just thought this was a little stilted, is all. Fitting, and a fun read, but stilted.

wow.
lack of t0k0 is a severe blow to t0k0's ego. i was mentioned twice, once by BC as seemingly a last minute addition and one by chao as AN OFFLINE MEMBER. let there be ANGER. FIX IT!. FIX IT NAO! i know i have at least ONE claim to animeb fame that most everyone knows about/remembers. dont make me write my own. I'll DO IT, Im CRAZY! (well, more likely WONT do it...)

Just ask nicely

...or write yer own. OK, it won't be continuity (pah!), and it might be a bit of an ego-trip, but it'll get your name up in lights Don't hear Donkey complaining he wasn't my faithful steed, do yer?