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The specifically detailed recording of the life and times of a Dragon Knight, a.k.a Zac's Blog

Public Service Announcement

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by , 2 Feb 2010 at 4:55 pm (1201 Views)
I'm here today to talk to you kids about a sensitive subject, maybe because its something your parents want to wait until your older for you to find out, or maybe because your belief system doesn't acknowledge it, but the board of administrators feels that this issue needs to be discussed as soon as possible. Of course, I'm referring to recent increase in Zombie Activity.

Now, as you all know, Zombies are bodies of those who have since died, that have risen again and have no other cognitive process other than to consume the brains and flesh of us living people. Now, as living people ourselves, we need to focus on how to deal with these Zombies and not become one of them ourselves.

First off, how can you tell the difference between a normal person and a Zombie? A Zombie will normally have a disheveled appearance and have the smell of rotting meat about them, they also move in an erratic and shuffling manner, which is why they are often mistaken for the homeless. How can you make the distinction? First, look at the eyes, Zombie's are blind by nature, so their eyes will have a milky white color to them, also look for blood stains on or around the mouth, as that will also be a big indicator that what your looking at is a Zombie.

Now that we know how to identify a Zombie, how do we deal with them? That's simple, all you have to do is destroy their brain and the problem is solved! As for the best way to go about this, take your surroundings into account and play to your strengths. If you only see one Zombie in front of you, you'd be better pressed to use something like a Baseball Bat, Axe, or Crowbar to dispatch it, whereas multiple Zombies should be dealt with at a distance, using a firearm or some Arrows.

Do you necessarily have to dispatch a Zombie? That's a great question. The answer is no, sometimes its better to just slip by a Zombie or two unnoticed, that way you conserve strength, ammo, and possibly save yourself the trouble of dealing with more of them than you'd like to handle, as Zombies have the tendency to appear from almost anywhere.

Now, on to one of the more important subjects, your escape plan. Do you know where you and your group will meet? Where your going? How your getting there? What supplies each person is bringing? All of these things and more should be discussed when making a Zombie Escape Plan or ZEP for short. Nothing should be left to the imagination, so that nothing important will be forgotten at the last minute.

Now, even more important, is to know the temperaments and individual quirks of your group. You need to know how each member will react in certain situations, as to avoid needless problems and possibly costly accidents. For instances, lets say Johnny can't handle the stress and decides he wants to open the emergency exit as he thinks its a safe way out, when there's only a group of Zombies on the outside, you need to know how to calm Johnny down before he gets someone hurt. *Reference "Pulling a "Steve" on Pg. 32*

Now that you have this information in hand, its up to you bright youngsters to apply it when the time comes. So go home tonight and make a ZEP with your family and friends, and make sure above all else, to stay safe. Goodnight everyone!
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  1. 's Avatar
    Interesting, I'll keep this in mind next time I see a zombie
  2. hinarei's Avatar

    "Do you have a zombie plan?"

    "A zombie plan? Of course not! I have thirty-seven zombie plans!"
  3. RDKnightZac's Avatar
    To Selo: Good to know I've been of help, that's why I do what I do.
    *Nods sagely*

    To Hinarei: Good man, one can never be too prepared in my opinion. And I shall ask you about your Zombie Plans, all thirty-seven of them.
    *Sits down and puts out some tea as he waits for Hina to begin*
  4. hinarei's Avatar
    In 36 of the 37 plans I use selo's fresh corpse as bait, so that I can make my initial escape from the legions of the undead!
  5. 's Avatar
    I think this might be of some help!
  6. RDKnightZac's Avatar
    To Hinarei: Interesting concept, I guess Selo tried to pull a "Steve" huh?

    To Selo: Very good, now that's proper application of knowledge!
    *Gives Selo a cookie*
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